Night Shift...ughh!

Sorry I have been missing, not that anyone reads this yet, but maybe someday :) I had a good excuse for being gone, night shift! Anyone who is a nurse knows what I am talking about. In the navy they make you rotate every 2 months from day to night shift. I usually love nights, as I am not a morning person but this weeks transition has been rough. To boot, it was ungodly slow at work this week.
I am in the midst of cycle #4 on clomid and feeling like crap physically and emotionally. I've been torturing myself by looking up the success rates of this cycle and all the crap I've read is not motivating. Blah, Blah, Blah if you don't get pregnant by the third cycle pretty much forget about it. I am so fearful of moving onto other options. Mostly because I'm just not sure there is much else I can do here, and I'm stuck here for the next 2 years! I also really thought that all I would need was a smidge of clomid to get pregnant. And facing the fact that it will take a lot more is really taking it's toll on me.
I did well today dealing with my newly pregnant friend at work. But I definitely flinched when she began complaining about her due date and not being able to head back to the states for Christmas. I understand the inconvenience but AT LEAST YOU ARE PREGNANT!!! I just don't want to hear about it, after everything she went through to get pregnant and everything I continue to go through on a daily basis. It's just plain annoying.
So on top of being irritable, and emotional as hell, I've been having hot flashes like a mad woman. I literally wake up sweating my ass off in the middle of the night, completely drenched. I hope that's a sign that it's working, but I refuse to get my hopes up. My monitoring U/S is Thursday morning on cycle day 15. I've been ovulating on day 18 or 19. We'll see, who knows!