Making Decisions.

As I said in my last post I've been thinking....a lot. Mostly about Navy career. I've felt a lot of pressure to stay in the Navy, especially over the last 4 months of this new administrative job that I have. I could do it. I could stay in, finish up my masters degree, finish up a second masters degree, sit in an office, make a lot of money, move around the world, play the game, possibly lose my husband and probably never be in one place long enough to get the help we need to have a child. PHEW!(that was a long run-on, sorry!) But I'm not going to. I'm going to be true to myself and what Sam and I are hopeful for. It sure sounds like a lot of fun to move around every three years, but it's not. Parts of it are, but no one tells you about the sucky stuff. The broken and stolen personal items, the living without your stuff for two months because it's "in transit", the fact that your husband can't find a job that pays more than $10 and hour because of bullshit labor laws, the loneliness that lasts about a year every time you move, saying goodbye to good friends every couple of months because it's their turn to move. Don't get me wrong the Navy has been good to me but it might be my turn to move on. I always thought I would get out when I was done with my time, but they sucked me in with promises of retirement benefits, $, and promotions. I'm ashamed to say that it all looked pretty attractive for awhile.
But Sam and I have talked. I will attempt to get orders back to my old duty station in VA, and then I will be done. We want a house to make memories in. We want a family. We want lifelong friends that we will see on a regular basis. I'm already half way to my MSN anyways. Who needs two masters degrees? There are so many other things that matter to me besides money and power. I need to remember that.

In other news, cycle day 10. Ultrasound on Tuesday. Hopefully I don't ovulate before then. I have little faith, but I hope that this is our cycle. I always hope.