A sad start to the New Year....

A few hours after we returned home from our trip to Florence (which was overall fantastic but slightly ruined by my irrational behavior) my world was ruined by some family news that I discovered on faceb.ook. My beautiful 34 year old cousin was killed instantly by a drunk driver going the wrong way on the free way. The drunk driver did not have a valid license and was being chased by the police. He survived with severe injuries. I am so angry and in shock. Corrie was the most beautiful, kind, and passionate person I've known. I was lucky to have seen her about 6 months ago at a family wedding. I am filled with sadness for her boyfriend, her 9 year old daughter, her two sisters, and her mother. Each time I talk to one of them I choke on my tears and am barely able to speak. It's just senseless and unbelievable. I'm still in shock.

I'm so hoping that this cycle works out. If I find out that I'm pregnant at the end of this week, it will help me find some joy in all of this sadness. I would love for my baby to have a connection with my cousin that I loved dearly. I will be praying for this. Not just for me and Sam but for the comfort of my family.
I'll write more about our trip when I'm not so torn up inside. It just doesn't seem right to talk about good things when everyone in my family is hurting so badly.